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 fly on the wings of what you might become with the gift of hope from your avatar... Shortly after experiencing the movie Avatar, it became strikingly obvious that there was a way to experience some of the essence of that movie right here on earth.
Imagine a world where you have access to your own avatar, that “embodiment or personification, as of a principle, attitude, or view of life”, the avatar that is a manifestation of you. Imagine a living, breathing individual that does so much more than simply reflect back everything that you love and loathe about yourself.
Then, imagine your horse as your avatar.
Continue reading No Need To Travel To Pandora To Find Your Avatar
 It was a long, cold, wet week here in the Pacific Northwest, complete with a few inches of snowfall, and I didn’t get out to see Sage for the entire week. I can’t remember the last time we were apart for so long. Fortunately, she is in a place now that I need not sit home and worry about her needing companionship, exercise, clean water, decent hay, or any of the other myriad challenges we have run into at other barns over the years.
Even A Dirty Horse Is Beautiful
Nevertheless, I drove to the barn today excited to see my horse. When I headed out through the pasture and crested the gently sloping hill in the light drizzle, I saw my light golden Palomino resplendent in dried mud from a week’s worth of rolling in, and tromping over, muddy acreage. And she was beautiful as ever.
Chosen By A Horse – Or Four
When Sage lifted her head from grazing and saw me, she came walking up to the crest of the hill to greet me. I buckled on her halter and started leading her away, back to the barn, when all of a sudden the rest of the herd – two geldings and a mare – all came pounding after us.
I was thrilled.
Continue reading Sometimes Nothing Means Everything To A Horse
 Take heed when closing the shutters on your horse, the window to your soul.
I have long been enthralled by the concept of animals being our mirrors. However, what if there is more to that than reflects the eye? What if I called my horse an extension of me? What if the things I respect and admire about her have been inside of me all along? I might find them if I look closely.
Perhaps, then, I don’t need her to be resistance-free, push-button, or dominated by me. In fact, if I see her for who she is and who I might be, then I cannot rejoice in crushing her spirit or completely molding her to my will whether through my hands, my voice, or my tools because that would be, in essence, an annihilation of pieces of me. And ladies, haven’t we all had enough of our pieces strewn across the floors of homes, schools, places of work, and even barns?
But there I go “spreading dangerous ideas” again…and its so not about rope halters.
Following is my ode to Epona, the Celtic goddess of horses; to me she also represents female strength. I entered this poem into the Tack N Talk Blog’s November Literary contest.
For more on women and inner goddesses, see Marriane Williamson’s book A Woman’s Worth.
For more on Epona, check out this site.
Love Of Horse And Goddess Force
When i came by this world
my goddess danced and swirled
cried, screamed like a banshee
but quiet, hush, or stern plea
would echo black
smacking her back
once, even clouds she could pass
then shriveled she, an amoeba on glass
though she would not die
alas, only a microscope’s eye
could find her within
drowned amidst the din;
ah, but she would rise
called by my sighs
golden phoenix from simmering flames
this goddess no one tames
one day I would scream
ride in from my dream
I know you well, horse
for you are goddess force
grace and power abide in you
from me, like a bird they flew
but upon your mighty back
goddess breathes my reins slack
you, a mere appendage, now a mirror
my goddess, no more shall I fear her;
Epona, we will make you proud
as we unveil from our heart’s shroud
and claim this world
with manes and desire unfurled.
Or perhaps I should ask, do a horse’s feelings matter?
Shortly after the publication of my rope halter article over at Horse City, I made the painful error of viewing the storm in the forum. I expected some of the reaction(s), but I was admittedly unprepared for a couple of responses that I saw come in -out of naiveness, I suppose – and these are what bothered me.  Sentient Sage Opinions come and go, and everyone is entitled to their own, but cruelty gets to me.
These responses had to do with horses being tied, and there was an input from someone telling about their “trainer” who had no qualms about smacking the rear end of a horse with a shovel when it pulled back while tied – all in the name of training. Someone else uses a broom. I think this stemmed from the fact that in the article I mention how Sage pulled back while I was doing groundwork, feeling exhuberant, and then her face was caught in the knots of the rope halter, punished for feeling good enough to buck and be a bit frisky on the end of a line. Apparently, that is not acceptable if you have a well-trained horse. Well, anyone who knows Sage knows that for a horse that has had about 3 months of professional training her whole life, she is pretty darned “well-behaved”. And if I choose not to punish her for bucking on the end of a line when she feels good, so be it.
I would rather give my horse, and her spirit, a little free rein when it comes to emotional expression. If she is not endangering herself or me or anyone around her, I see no problem with giving this other spirit on the earth a little free will and respect.
Last night I started a beautiful book called “The Emotional Lives of Animals: A Leading Scientist Explores Animal Joy, Sorrow, and Empathy – and Why They Matter”. In it, Mark Bekoff says, “Animals are our consummate companions who help us each and every day. Without close and reciprocal relationships with other animal beings, we’re alienated from the rich, diverse, and magnificent world in which we live. That’s why we seek out animals for emotional support. Our old Paleolithic brains pull us back to what’s natural but missing in our fast-moving world: close interrelationships with other beings that helps us figure out who we are in the grand scheme of things. Animals comfort us and put us in touch with what really matters – other sentient beings. A sentient animal is one for whom feelings matter…”
And smacking a horse with a shovel is not respecting those sentient beings.
Bekoff also says in his gem of a book that “the value of animals to humans cannot be overstated. and it’s their emotions that draw us to them. And yet, while we need animals, many animals would surely do much better without us.”
Amen to that.
 Sage and Eleanor, choosing each other, eight years ago
My horse constantly surprises me. Perhaps it is for the simple reason of keeping me on my toes and letting me know that I do not know it all.
I was sweetly reminded of that yesterday, just two days after blogging about how Sage usually resisted leaving the herd, could definitely be called herd-bound, and seemed to usually prefer the company of horses over mine (see Herd Is A Four Letter Word).
Well, I arrived at the barn Wednesday, a beautiful and sunny autumn afternoon, not expecting anything different. However, as soon as Sage saw me she gave out a little whinny welcome and didn’t walk but trotted up to see me with enthusiasm. Normally she walks up to me but sometimes she will just look and then go back to eating until I walk up to her. I have never had to “catch” her or walk after her or use treats to get her, but since settling into this herd I have felt sometimes like the outsider.
What a lovely, profound thought that she perceived this somehow. Or maybe it was just purely coincidence.
In any case, she walked all the way back to the barn with me, away from the herd, only slowing down to belt out one loud whinny, calling to her mare friend River. Another surprise, River came away from the rest of the group to join up with us. The two geldings remained with their noses in the grass and blackberry bushes.
I felt like Sage had called out to River saying, “hey, come on, this is our herd leader right now, and we don’t want to let her down”.
I guess when you give up needing what you can’t have, it might just come to you when you least expect it.
 Sage hanging out with her buddies
Long ago I naively believed the books and the trainers when they said you need to be a good “herd leader” for your horse.
But I was never really part of Sage’s herd.
Herd Member Or Poor Substitute?
I would blow in like the wind a few times a week, interject myself into her daily rhythm, and then go back to my home and family. On a good day I might be seen as a grooming buddy, a diversion from boredom, a source for food, and someone she liked to spend time with, but I was never a herd member.
However, for years I lived under this “herd” delusion. It was fueled in part by the fact that she had very few options to replace me. She would always come willingly to me when she saw me, even away from food. In the boarding environment, she was normally stalled as well as turned out alone. I used to feel happy and proud when she came up to see me; I felt she was truly bonded to me, and she was looking at me like her “herd leader”. I had achieved what the books said I should achieve. I was a success with my horse – or was I just a poor substitute for horse companionship?
Continue reading When Herd Is A Four-Letter Word…Remember, “Love” Is Too
 the equine skull I had my veterinarian out yesterday to give Sage a dental check-up, and I was pleasantly surprised to hear him say after his exam that she actually did not need a float or dental work. I had been feeling guilty for a while about not having an equine dentist out since she was seemingly overdue (according to the last vet who had worked on her – one year ago). I ended up paying for a call and a general exam, less than half the cost of a full-blown dental, so my checkbook was pleasantly surprised as well. And I could feel good about keeping up with preventive care for her.
Continue reading Something To Chew On: A Dental Check-up For Sage
 This show horse was drawn by my sister Monica; she would have been in elementary school when she drew it.
A few months ago I received a package from my father; in it were three drawings that my sister had created with pencil and Crayola crayon, probably when she was in elementary school. That places them at more than 30 years old. I remember her as being quite artistic as a young girl, and she was especially fond of her equine subjects. Unfortunately, the three pieces that I now have seem to be all that remain of her adventures into the world of equine art.
What, pray tell, does this have to do with the plight and woes of wild horses? You will need to go back in time several years.
It was just over seven years ago, on a hot July day in 2002, and the Red Waffle fire in the Pryor Mountains was raging. It would consume 5,000 acres before its hunger was satiated. Smoke billowed out and up until it smothered the stars.
Continue reading Wild Horses And A Cavalry Of Woe
 Image from tipiro The roundup has ended, but herds and families have been permanently torn apart. I have put my angst over this into a poem, and it is dedicated to Cloud, all wild horses, and those who love them.
I am still searching for the silver lining in this.
In a letter on the Cloud Foundation’s blog, written by Ginger Kathrens, she mentions an offspring of Cloud’s named Sage, now in a holding pen to be adopted. I wonder what the future holds for that little Sage.
For more information on the roundup and/or Cloud, please visit The Cloud Foundation.
Ballad of Cloud is now featured on my website.
 Sage's outdoor dressage arena I was aptly reminded of my ignorance today by a three year old.
I was riding Sage with my now-standard gear of halter, bareback pad, and cowboy boots while my audience of one watched intently from the sidelines, waiting patiently for her turn.
My Favorite Flavor Is Patience
Patience for a three year old is more than a virtue – its an ice cream cone on a hot day. It melts fast and can leave a big, sticky mess.
I was trying to take advantage of my more-than-likely short horse ride and was deep in thought, trying to practice what I have been reading in my Centered Riding book before time was up and the arena became filled with melted ice cream.
Dressage And The Alphabet
“What are the letters for?” my daughter asked out of the blue.
After a moment of confusion, I realized that she was referring to the letters in the arena. She doesn’t quite have the whole alphabet down, but I assume she knows it well enough to know that C, M, E, F, P, R, and K are out of sequence and not the complete alphabet.
“Well”, I said after some thought, not being a dressage expert, “I think they are for patterns, you know; you need to get your horse to go from one letter to another.”
“I want Sage to do that.”
“Oh, well, Sage doesn’t know how to do that sweetie. And neither do I. But let’s see what we can do.”
And knowing pretty well that my one-on-one time with Sage was up, I walked Sage through some zig-zagged imaginary dressage test to the giggles and amusement of my 3 year old judge. I then put her up on Sage herself and tested her knowledge of the letters and what words began with each one.
End On A Positive Note – With Horses And Three Year Olds
I ended up holding preschool in a dressage arena instead of getting much further along in Sage’s progress or mine. Alas, I am realizing lately just how very green my horse and I are; she has only had a couple of months of professional training, which took place a few years back, while I have spent the majority of time over the past eight years trying to figure out what ailed her. I did not concentrate on riding over that time – and neither did she.
However, each time I dismount now and return her to her herd, I hope that I am leaving her a little less green (but just as Sage) than when I led her out to the arena.
She’s only ten; I have some time. Perhaps one day before she and I are old ladies we will both do dressage together after all. Sans cowboy boots.
 My First Palomino I recently ran across this picture of me as a young girl, riding my first “horse”. There are many pictures of my siblings and I with this horse in the background, so she was well-used and well-loved. Perhaps some fond memories of great backyard rides on this rocking horse burned into my brain a love of golden horses!
As a young girl on a metal and plastic toy, then later as a teen and young adult on the real live thing, I never thought much about riding technique. Well, that is until I got into Western showing, especially in the equitation classes where stiff body, heels down, don’t-move-or-breathe was the norm for me. All for the elusive blue ribbon; my poor horse!
Going Forward
Since I finally have Sage back on a track to health and fitness, after eight long years of trying to fix her, I can actually concentrate on getting on her back and riding her now. Before I jump on, though, save for a few bareback sessions, I have decided to concentrate on basic groundwork with her when I am out at the barn and read some books on riding when I am at home.
Sage is slimming down and toning up remarkably quickly at her new home, so she will be better able to carry me now than ever before. I certainly do not want to do anything up on her back to send her backwards in progress now that her spine and alignment are getting healthy. We have come too far, and I am in no hurry.
Riding Through The Pages
So, I picked up copies of Peggy Cummings Connected Riding and Connected Groundwork , Tom Nagel’s Zen and Horseback Riding, and I am re-reading Sally Swift’s excellent book Centered Riding. I also have a few more books on order from the library, but this is a good start. A goal of mine is to get some lessons in the near future, but for now the books – especially library books – are quite a bit more economical.
 Bodywork doesn't get much better than this; and River doesn't charge me!
As you can see from the picture, Sage has settled into her new home quite nicely. She and the other mare, River (four year old part Clydesdale), love to spend time practicing their bodywork skills on each other. This is fabulous for Sage, as she needs the spine stretches, the square stance, and the relaxation.
As you can see, it only took two weeks for her to slim down and tone up a LOT because of all the daily walking out on sloping acreage. Her diarrhea is gone, and perhaps I can finally get her tail white…
So, even though it is stressful on a horse (and owner) to change barns, home should be where they have the potential to be happiest and “horsiest”. We seem to have found that. I changed barns annually (or even more frequent) over the last eight years, but looking back it was all leading to this. I have no regrets because it makes this place all the more sweeter, just like the big, bold blackberries weighing down the bushes on the fenceline.
Check out more pictures of her new home.
 Sage in her new home with her new herd; click to go to my website.
I recently embarked upon an eight day trip through Oregon and Northern California and back again to my home state of Washington. I am California-born and raised, so it isn’t uncommon for me to visit.
What is unusual is that this time my husband and I packed two young children and one very large dog into a Dodge Charger along with our luggage, bags of snacks, bottled water, and various boxes of Crayons and toys for the children’s amusement while stuffed into our mobile sardine can.
The trip reminded me that “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” and that you can pretty much count on rainbows at the end of storms – even if they take a while to appear. Many thanks to Crayola, Hilton, probiotics, and credit card fraud departments…
So what does all this have to do with horses?
Well, when I returned from California I moved Sage to a private barn, one that I had discovered a few days prior to leaving on my road trip. I felt it was time to move her, maybe past time, for various reasons. Mostly I knew in my gut that Sage was still not in the best situation for her, alone 24/7 in a large turnout; it was large, but she was still alone except for the horses on either side of her and the cows behind her (the cows that would be slaughtered in full view of her this Fall).
Physically, she and I had overcome some huge challenges with her body and her hooves, but I was convinced that emotionally there was still a lot of room to help her. And if I help her emotionally and mentally, the physical will be better able to resolve itself.
That has been easier said than done, for just as the California miners worked so diligently panning for gold but finding iron pyrite, so I have felt over the past eight years trying to find Sage the best boarding situation. These places often turned out to be sparkling pyrite amidst lots of plain brown sucking mud.
I had formerly picked facilities based upon what those facilities had to offer my horse. This time I made my decision based upon the owner’s horses. After all, horses can tell you a lot without words, and they often mirror their owner as well.
I felt comfortable with the woman, but I had judged a person wrong in the past many times. I was, however, fairly comfortable trusting my judgement of the horses.
The big gray Percheron/Thoroughbred was the one who really convinced me. A gentle giant, he appeared completely serene and composed, he looked healthy, and he left me with a profound sense of suitability about the whole situation. He and the two other horses with him walked around all day on acre after acre of gently sloping grass.
At night the horses are brought into a stall, and this is the one area of concern that I had. Sage had taught me that on no uncertain terms she did not like stalls; I had come to have an aversion to them myself. However, these horses were out roaming pastures for 14 hours a day, rolling, grazing, and playing together; perhaps Sage would settle into a night in a stall (one with no bars across the front) after all of this daytime camaraderie. With all the overwhelming positives of this situation, I felt I owed it to Sage to give it a try.
I moved Sage on Sunday, and while she was a bit uncertain about the whole thing that day, she seems to be settling in just fine. Her poop is normal – a huge indicator of her state of well-being – and the owner told me that she walked right into her stall the third night without a halter or a rope on after the three other horses had settled into their stalls. She is part of the herd now, and the herd is in the barn by night.
It was still nice to have my horse choose me over the herd, as much as I want her to be happy in her new home. I was selfishly pleased that she came to me when she saw me yesterday and hung around the barn until I left.
I am looking forward to my first ride this weekend on a new sage green bareback pad that should arrive today. Oh, did I mention that there is a gorgeous outdoor arena with the best footing I have ever ridden on and the place is closer to my home than the last?
It is hard on a horse to change homes, and Sage has had to do that too many times in the past eight years. However, perhaps we have finally found our gold and can stake a claim to a place for a long while. We have definitely earned it!
(For more background on Sage and our 8 year saga, see my website)
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Rope Halter Follow-up: They May Knot Be Natural, But They DO Have Their Fans
Yesterday I received a very long and thoughtful email response to my recent rope halter face-off article, up at Horse City; it was from someone who was obviously very much a believer in natural horsemanship and rope halters. I think he was sincerely trying to get me to see the error of my ways and bring me back into the folds of natural horsemanship.
I thought I would post my response to him here as a follow-up to that ar
ticle:
“Thanks for writing; I actually agree with some of what you said. What I wanted to convey in my article is that the rope halters are just not as “natural” as people think – usually when you attach that word to things it gives people a warm fuzzy feeling. People also think snaffles are no big deal but we know in the wrong hands they can cause more pain than a curb bit in the right hands.
I just wanted to give a different perspective on the whole thing; I wasn’t even suggesting banning rope halters or not using them at all. I just know that a lot of people out there have no idea how much pain that things they use on their horses can inflict. I know that my horse gets kicked and bitten (she is on the low rung of the ladder as far as her position in the herd). But I am not bought into your argument there (I used to be). You see, my horse actually hangs around and is best buddies with the mare in her little herd who is just about the same level as her – not the one who bites, kicks, and bosses her.The boss of the herd of 4 is actually a big grey gelding who hangs out by himself a lot. I don’t want to be him. I started changing a lot of my thoughts on this in reading Mark Rashid’s books, and I found myself gravitating to his philosophy (so its not just my vet
). I just personally think its better if you can get results you want without causing/inflicting ANY pain. A fly can cause a horse to move too.
I have learned not to take any one person’s opinion as best for me and my horse; if you read my website, you will understand why. I sincerely and strongly believe that everyone needs to do what works best for their individual horse.
Also, I have a very sensitive horse, and the rope halter probably gives her way more correction than she needs. The other point of my article is that you need to figure out what is best for your own horse, not just what someone tells you to buy or what everyone else is using.”
Ultimately, if I can get my horse do what I ask without the use of pain or extreme discomfort, isn’t that better in the end?
I hope to always remember and respect the lightness of a fly and the spirit of my horse.
See also Mark Rashid’s article on Passive Leadership on his website.
p.s. just for the record, I receive NO benefit from the sale of any kind of halter