the Sage By Nature blog

I was just reading an article summarizing research into the incredible long-term memory capability of Equus caballus. It seems that the survival of their species has depended upon the development of an exceptional memory. A cougar behind a rock that attacks them and almost eats them would leave the memory of the rock as a very dangerous place to be indeed.

If they didn’t remember that, they would not last long out in the wild.

But what of memory suppression? What about all the stuff that gets stored just beneath the surface, in the cellular memory? What about memories that need to be suppressed for survival? I am just now learning about this, but Sage has been a big contributor to my first-hand knowledge.

Within days of Dr. Seeyle’s visit, Sage’s memory must have come brimming or boiling to the surface, molecules of emotion ready to be released finally; since last Sunday she has refused to allow a halter to be placed on her head. At first I was stunned as well as a little alarmed, but I thought to myself, “ok, don’t panic, see what happens next time, and don’t force it”. So I let her be and returned two days later.

Nope, same thing, she was having nothin’ to do with that halter, any halter, rope or regular it did not matter. Aromatherapy and treats had a small impact but not enough to overcome what she was going through at the time. So I did what I could, but I did not want to force her. I noticed that she was sensitive to the rope around her neck, so I ended on a positive note of just having her stand still with the lead rope around her neck.

I called Dr. Seeyle from the barn, and I described the situation. Sage was doing doing the big yawns that Dr. Seeyle said were a good sign (making new neural connections requires more oxygen, hence the yawns), so she was not alarmed and said it was all part of Sage’s evolution. It was, in fact, good news. I said that I had thought she was probably releasing the stored memory of the trauma that she had gone through as a young horse, and the doctor agreed.

Sage needed to work this out in order to get better.

I couldn’t get out again until today, Sunday, and Sage was her whinnying self and trotted up to greet me. At first all I did was some light bodywork that Dr. Seeyle had recommended. All went well until I brought out the halter.

Again, she didn’t want it on her. But after a little coaxing and some intial tries I confidently moved the halter up onto her head as Dr. Seeyle had recommended and things were going smoothly – until I started to pull the rope down over her poll to tie the knot in the rope halter. As soon as Sage felt the rope tighten the slightest bit on her poll, she started to pull back and back away from the pressure. I let go of her so the halter could fall off, and I could not get that close again.

OK, so now what was I to do? I did not want to leave her on that note, letting her pull out of the halter, letting her fear and the memories win.

I had time. So I turned my back and waited a little while until she came back to me.

She actually licked me on my back and then my sleeve when she got there.

“OK, Sage, thank you, yes I know its not me personally, its the memory, but I appreciate the reminder so I don’t take this personally.”

I realized that the rope on her neck was a BIG issue with her; even when I put the lead rope over and around her neck she would tense up and start to back away. So I decided to work from that point and get some kind of relaxation from her before leaving, some kind of forward progress. This was Sage after all, and it was me with her and not the people who did this to her, and I knew that I could do it.

I carefully and gently placed the rope over her neck and as she started backing away I made sure I stayed with her. I was also very careful of her not backing into the electric fence or other object that would ruin the moment. She was tense and resistant the entire time, simply with that rope around her neck, no halter, no other pressure. But I kept with her, sensing that this was a very important time for us.

It was getting hot, so I slowly moved us under a tree. She would come with a pull on the rope loop, but only reluctantly. I kept talking and coaxing and reassuring her. When we got under the tree, I asked for a little more, placing my hand on the top of her neck and rubbing down the right side through the thick mane(the right side is particularly scary for her). She kept shaking her head up and down, almost frowning at me, and I got a sense of her saying “don’t make me go through this”. I think that was a difficult part for both of us.

There is a fine line between going to far and not going far enough. I didn’t want to set her back, but I couldn’t let her stay this way with no forward progress either. I wasn’t a horse whisperer, but this was Sage, my beautiful horse of eight years; we had been through thick and thin.

I knew we could do it. Oh, please let us do it, Sage.

Finally, after a lot of patience and some delicate rubbing on her head and oh-so-slight pressure on her neck and poll, her neck relaxed down and she let out a sigh, licking her lips.

A big bell went off in my head reminding me that when a horse gives to the pressure, you must release it immediately. That is their reward, and that is how they learn and how you get forward progress.

But I couldn’t risk upsetting her by flipping that rope off, so I gently slid it off backwards over her back and loins. She was completely fine with that. That was the note I was going to end on, a positive one, and I feel like I got a lot out of her today even though it may have been just a baby step.

Even horses have to learn to walk before they can run.

Make sure that you read The Evolution of Sage and also previous posts on Sage Herself.